Do You Know Your Goals/ Dreams/ Desires/ Expectations are Biggest Hindrances to Your Progress?
24th January 2020
Do You Know Your Goals/ Dreams/ Desires/ Expectations are Biggest Hindrances to Your Progress?
Dear Fellow Travellers,
Greetings from Hitesh! Today we are taking 100% different subject matter. It deals with you and your goals/dreams and desires. If you have read motivational coaches/books and attended personality development programs they all unanimously talk about Goal Setting. If you read management literature – they also talk about MBO – Management by Objective. Any investor coming to the market talk about the expected returns before investing. I am sharing my own experiences.
What Normal Coach Teaches?
I have attended the N number of GURUs Seminar and they all start with Goal setting. Then they talk about setting different goals for different areas – Health goals / Money goals / Relationship goals / Spiritual goals and things like that. Once you set your goals – do the planning for execution for the same. While you are executing your plan – keep on comparing your results with the GOALS. If you are not going towards your goals – you think for new ways to achieve your goals. But stick to your goals in any case. My GURU told me to have a commitment to kill myself – if I don’t achieve my goals.
The most important thing they have taught me is to set goals and go to the market or meet the clients. Say I have a goal to buy a MERCEDES and now I am meeting my clients. Since I want to by Mercedes badly – I will take all the efforts to convince my clients to buy my products to him. I will be better placed to deal with his objections as I am determined to by my MERCEDES.
If you listen or read above – it looks 100% logical/rational and appealing to the mind. Am I right?
Let me give you good NEWS – whether you achieve your goals or not – the Motivational speaker achieved his financial goals by selling you his talk.
What is my Personal Observation?
I have observed the following consequences of the above system.
Lack of Commitment / Honesty: -
When you have set the goals and you are keeping track of your progress – your energy gets divided into two parts – taking your actions toward your goals and monitoring your goals. Your commitment gets divided. Not only this – you resort to achieve your goals at any cost. You end up being manipulative or end up being exploited (understand the #METOO cases of last year). Most cases of manipulations or exploitation are the reason for personal GREED / DESIRE or Madness to achieve his or her goals at any cost.
Moreover, when you have set goals in various areas like health/money/relationship etc., etc. you can’t remain committed to a single goal.
Say you have bought a share which you think can double your money – and now you are monitoring the prices everyday evening. If the prices have moved up that day – you will be excited and if the prices have moved down – you will be frustrated on that day.
One may say that what is wrong in this? Monitoring daily fluctuation will shake up your conviction in your actions (in this case your investment idea). You will doubt your actions (your investment idea) – whether you are on the right path or not? When you lose your conviction – you just stop working on that area (sell your shares in our example). I have often observed many clients complain that shares go up like anything after they sell their shares.
Unnecessary Stress: -
Many guys say they can’t run if they have not taken loans from other people. They believe that by taking loans – they will run to earn money to repay and, in the process, they will reach their goals.
When you do something out of STRESS – you can’t be happy doing it or when you get to the results. The funny aspect of goal setting is you start that process only and only because you believe that by reaching your goals – you will be HAPPY. Thanks to your STRESS – you are unhappy.
Role of SUBCONSCIOUS MIND: -
When you believe that you have to achieve something to be happy consciously – you also believe that you LACK something within / your life is not perfect without that particular CAR or thing or that person – subconsciously. They say in any normal human – 90% of the role is played by the subconscious mind. When your 90% is acting out of POVERTY or LACK of something or desire of something – you can’t be happy when you get to your goals.
Always remaining FUTURE ORIENTED: -
Once your mind becomes GOAL oriented – you always remain in the future. You foresee something happening in the FUTURE that will make you HAPPY. So, there is no TODAY in your dictionary. Whenever you talk – you talk about TOMORROW. As soon as you get your MERCEDES – your mind will start thinking about NEWER MODELS or BETTER CARS than MERCEDES. In fact, you will only get KICK to the extent your future looks bright.
HAPPINESS is always a PRESENT phenomenon and not future happenings. If you are not happy at this moment, the chances of being happy tomorrow are very less. Because a moment of happiness leads to the next moment of happiness and moment of unhappiness leads to the next moment of unhappiness. Our life is given in MOMENTS and not in YEARS, as believed by most guys.
What is the right way for happiness?
After trying all the ways mentioned above, I am studying GITA for the last 10 years and I have adopted my life based on the SECRETS shared by LORD KRISHNA.
Be excellent in your areas of work. Whatever you may be doing. When I am doing my work excellently – I will have inner happiness of doing those things. So, I am happy with the START of the work. I am getting ALIGNED to my inner being and that alignment leads to inner harmony. So, I have no STRESS while I am doing my work.
Karmanye vadhika raste, Ma phaleshu kadachana
This is another advice. You do your work. Results will follow from NATURE/EXISTENCE. This is an attitude of SURRENDER. Once you are excellent in your work and you do it out of the above attitude – you become NON-DOER and existence becomes the doer and believe me RESULTS will make your 100% HAPPY.
Gahana karmano gatih: -
Most guys operate out of the LINEAR relationship with their activities and results. They say – they have done this and this thing – it means they MUST GET the expected results. Say a Patient wife goes to the temple for fast recovery of her husband from the illness and a Doctor’s wife also goes to the temple for business growth of her husband – who should GOD listen?
That’s why Lord Krishna says – there are no linear relationships between your KARMA and Your Results.
Controlling your DESTINY: -
When you focus on your actions with the above 3 parameters – you feel more powerful within / more confidence within. This will lead to a sense of control in your life. You will feel that you have all the powers to take life to wherever you want to take it or you can do whatever you want to do it. These feelings will make you happy in all the situations and all the results.
Going beyond Success or Failures: -
All your successes and failures are the results of your Goals/dreams and desires. You always compare your performance with them. When you meet your goals – you feel success and when you don’t meet your goals – you feel failures. Am I right?
You always remain in the dual status. Happiness and Unhappiness. Both will be temporary in your case (Prices moved up today – you are happy and prices moved down tomorrow – you are unhappy). Krishna talks about the 3rd state of mind. The mind filled with BLISS. Bliss will come in your life if you follow the above system and it will remain with you permanently. No one can achieve BLISS, it comes on its own based on your alignment with the LAWS of KARMA.
BUFFETT is the living example of following above principles: -
Take out time and study BUFFETT. You will see that he is the strict follower of Lord Krishna’s Principles of KARMA. He buys when his calculation tells him (“Yogah Karmasu Kaushalam”). He is not bothered by MARKET's opinion. He is okay if the market closes after his buy (Surrender). His happiness comes from HOLDING particular stock in his portfolio. Berkshire’s textile division was making losses or very meager profit since he took over – but he kept it on from 1965 to 1985. He is not Goal Oriented. If he was goal-oriented he would have sold all loss-making division from day one. He has hardly sold his loss-making companies.
What NEXT?
Happiness is always a PRESENT PHENOMENON. If you follow the above principles – your life will remain in the PRESENT MOMENT most of the time. When you are in present most of the time to start with – you will see a glimpse of happiness and that will lead to BLISS someday.
I wish you all a very HAPPY LIFE.
I wish you all a very HAPPY LIFE.
Follow me on Twitter @hiteshmparikh / WhatsApp – +91-9869425399.
Live With Passion…Invest With Passion.
Hitesh Parikh
Your Personal Destiny Manager.
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